The Saga of Management review of writing style
(Author unknown)
Question: How many feet do mice have?
Original text: Mice have four feet.
Management comment: Elaborate!
Revision 1: Mice have five appendages, and four of them are feet.
Management comment: No discussion of fifth appendage!
Revision 2: Mice have five appendages; four of them are feet and one is a tail.
Management comment: What? Feet with no legs?
Revision 3: Mice have four legs, four feet, and one tail per unit-mouse.
Management comment: Confusing. Is that a total of nine appendages?
Revision 4: Mice have four leg-foot assemblies and one tail assembly per body.
Management comment: Does not fully discuss the issue!
Revision 5: Each mouse comes equipped with four legs and a tail. Each leg is equipped with a foot and the end opposite the body; the tail is not equipped with a foot.
Management comment: Descriptive? Yes. Forceful? No.
Revision 6: Allotment appendages for mice will be: Four leg-foot assemblies, one tail. Deviation from this policy is not permitted as it would constitute misapportionment of scarce appendage assets.
Management comment: too authoritative! Stifles creativity!
Revision 7: Mice have four feet; Each foot is attached to a small leg joined internally with the overall mouse structural subsystem. Also attached to the mouse subsystem is thin tail, nonfunctional and ornamental in nature.
Management comment: Too verbose! Too scientific! Answer the question.
Final Revision approved by management: Mice have four feet.
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